There are very few things as relaxing as getting a spa pedicure: you slide your legs into warm bubbly water, sit back in a massage chair and read a trashy colorful magazine; your feet are scrubbed with a pumice stone and the foot and leg massage that follow feel great! A pedicure is very functional, you get hygiene and beauty (minus the pain) rolled into one. I definitely agree with Aisha Tyler on this (in her book "Swerve"). Guys, take note! If you are looking for a fabulous gift for your sweetie (yeah Valentine's is around the corner, we know), you cannot go wrong with a gift certificate to a spa. It doesn't have to be one of those expensive, snooty, high-end ones either. Girls love to be pampered. Of course, you've gotta work with your budget--but it's not that hard to give a memorable gift. I am going to list some suggestions of stuff to give (or do) for your honey this Valentine's. Why do I even care? I'm unattached and not expecting any romantic overtures. So maybe it's just my own wishlist, but there are a lot of people who agree with me!
1) Gift certificate to a spa. Or to hell with it, if you have the skills--just take a bottle of massage oil over and give the massage yourself! I once got a foot massage at the club from some guy--ladies I'm sure y'all know how feet ache after a few hours of dancing or even just standing in some of those pretty shoes--it took a few minutes but it was memorable (he wasn't).
2) CHOCOLATE. Yes, it is cliche, but it does work. Think along the lines of Ferrero Roche, Godiva, Lindt, going up. You don't have to break the bank, but if Hershey's or milky way is the only thing you can afford, I say give it up and go for something you don't have to spend a lot of $$ on.
3) Love POEM. Another cliche, but it really works. And I'm not talking about those high school love letters that your friends helped you write! I swear, there must be some kind of form letter circulating in Kenyan secondary schools and every boy gets a copy of it, fills in the name of the girl he likes, signs his name, and mails it off! It does NOT make a girl feel special if she gets an exact copy of her roommate's letter. And yes, we may share your letters or poems with our friends. Or we just keep them for ourselves as souvenirs. So write it well! And don't write it on notebook paper please! (It worked when you were younger but not anymore). And don't write about yourself either!
4) FOOD. Cook it, buy it, whatever. Just make sure you know if the person is a vegetarian/vegan or on a liquid/raw diet. I once shared some meat ravioli (accidentally of course) with a roommate, and the results were disastrous. Sorry K!
5) MUSIC. Buy it, play it, or sing if you have the talent.
6) LINGERIE. You need to be in that kind of relationship and you need to know the sizes well. or else get a giftcard.
And the list goes on...Basically, it's about you spending time with someone and showing them that they are special. It DOES NOT have to cost a lot of money, if you have the $$ go ahead and splurge but if you don't then just put some time or creative thinking into it.
WHAT NOT TO DO:
I think for all the gifts to be appreciated you need to have a special relationship with the person. There's nothing like receiving a love letter from a random acquintance that not only spells out all of your names, but describes you (or him) in detail--you are thinking "Do I know this person?". Words like stalker, creep, and arrogant asshole run through your mind instantly. Do NOT be too presumptous please. You know, us ladies are brought up to be polite and in turn kindness is mistaken for like. And if you're trying to guess if the person likes you--they probably don't. Sorry to be so pessimistic. But some people need to hear this. Or maybe the person likes you but if they are not putting any effort it's not worth it.
OK, now that I have the whole Valentine's thing out of the way, I'll be moving on to other subjects. Do NOT ask your unattached friends "Why" they are not with somebody. It happens. For various reasons. And just so you know, February 14th is also "Quirkyalone" day (a great book by Sasha Cagen). If you don't know what it means, look it up!
Sunday, January 29, 2006
Sunday, January 22, 2006
The Kenyan govt, famine, wealth and squalor co-exist.
This is one of the things that breaks my heart and makes me lose hope in this world and this life: the gross inequality and unjust distribution of resources. We see this everywhere; just walking down the city streets you see the homeless and utterly destitute who have NOTHING! We barely glance at them as we rush off to our lives (probably dismissing them as lazy,psycho, drug-addicted bums who just use up resources--hey! let's be honest here!) Only to look beside them and see the loud displays of wealth: designer stores with merchandise equal to the GDP of some third-world countries, cars that can fund your entire education at a posh private university with pocket money and a ticket home every year, rich people wearing jewelry and outfits worth more than some people make in a year, and other blaring signs of prosperity. It is amazing how so much wealth and squalor can co-exist.
Now with all that in mind, the whole famine situation in Kenya is just like that. People are starving to death! As in they live life on such a basic level that if there's no rain, then that maize and maharagwe that they planted will not grow. Just imagine what mothers say to their kids when they're crying for food...Hunger is such a primal urge--you have to get it fulfilled coz it's about survival! But wait--contrary to popular Western belief, Kenya (or as many annoyingly refer to it "Africa") IS NOT JUST A BIG HOT DESERT! Our country is blessed to have different climates and geographical areas so it rains a lot in some parts of the country and they grow so much food that they have a surplus. But while there is a lot of surplus food in one part of the country, there's very little on the other side. My older sis and I have been talking about this situation and it so sad. This is where the government officials are supposed to step in, coz that is their JOB--didn't they swear to serve and defend the people? So, now let's change scenes and focus on the Govt. They are offering farmers credit notes to purchase the maize for the famine-stricken people. What the f*** is a CREDIT NOTE? Who will recognize it? What is it even worth? That is the big question farmers ask because they want to get the best value for their products-they've gotta survive too!
So the govt is SUPPOSEDLY broke, so that means the credit notes are worth shit! It's like when you write a check to somebody but you know the balance in your account will not cover it. Or maybe that check will totally clean you out. Whatever. Not a great situation. Isn't it ironic that the leaders of a "poor" struggling economy show up to a seminar on famine rolling in the latest expensive rides? Check out this article "Ministers step out in style" http://www.eastandard.net/archives/cl/hm_news/news.php?articleid=35261 And the MORE important ones have to roll in a motorcade or just charter a flight...Of course, we know that important people don't go places without bodyguards, assistants, drivers, etc But please tell me, does that mean that your 3rd wife's brother's sons need to roll with you? It's not that there isn't any money, it's how they choose to spend it--in this case MAINLY on themselves. Come on, if you could choose your own salary and perks, wouldn't you give yourself the best? But what we see is pure greed. It is true that people need to be compensated according to their talents and job description, but if you are in public service you have an obligation to make choices for the greater good. I know this is a very idealistic concept, but we can make some parts of it reality.
To finish off my commentary on this I want to unleash views from some of our brilliant leaders. Kenyan Finance Minister David Mwiraria has warned that the government may soon have to cut its funding to ministries to cover the costs of the drought. Minister Charity Ngilu said her department could not cope with cuts to the health budget.
"I am urging Mr Mwiraria to instead increase the health budget because I believe that more people will visit health centres and hospitals frequently because of diseases related to famine and drought," Kenya's Daily Nation newspaper quotes Ms Ngilu as saying.
Now, I think anyone can analyze the situation using very basic logic--cause and effect. You could even draw a diagram! So the govt may "soon" cut funds to ministries so they can feed people. Does that sound urgent to you? Does soon mean before the year is over? or perhaps before the next General Election? And did they say Maybe? I don't know what kind of health/medical exposure or background Charity Ngilu has--but once again one doesn't need a degree or work experience to know that if somebody will "visit...hospitals frequently because of diseases related to famine and drought." you are just saying a person is Hungry, famished, starving and NEEDS FOOD AND WATER! So, it does NOT make sense to treat symptoms without looking at the ROOT CAUSE!! Oh well, same old sad story...
Now with all that in mind, the whole famine situation in Kenya is just like that. People are starving to death! As in they live life on such a basic level that if there's no rain, then that maize and maharagwe that they planted will not grow. Just imagine what mothers say to their kids when they're crying for food...Hunger is such a primal urge--you have to get it fulfilled coz it's about survival! But wait--contrary to popular Western belief, Kenya (or as many annoyingly refer to it "Africa") IS NOT JUST A BIG HOT DESERT! Our country is blessed to have different climates and geographical areas so it rains a lot in some parts of the country and they grow so much food that they have a surplus. But while there is a lot of surplus food in one part of the country, there's very little on the other side. My older sis and I have been talking about this situation and it so sad. This is where the government officials are supposed to step in, coz that is their JOB--didn't they swear to serve and defend the people? So, now let's change scenes and focus on the Govt. They are offering farmers credit notes to purchase the maize for the famine-stricken people. What the f*** is a CREDIT NOTE? Who will recognize it? What is it even worth? That is the big question farmers ask because they want to get the best value for their products-they've gotta survive too!
So the govt is SUPPOSEDLY broke, so that means the credit notes are worth shit! It's like when you write a check to somebody but you know the balance in your account will not cover it. Or maybe that check will totally clean you out. Whatever. Not a great situation. Isn't it ironic that the leaders of a "poor" struggling economy show up to a seminar on famine rolling in the latest expensive rides? Check out this article "Ministers step out in style" http://www.eastandard.net/archives/cl/hm_news/news.php?articleid=35261 And the MORE important ones have to roll in a motorcade or just charter a flight...Of course, we know that important people don't go places without bodyguards, assistants, drivers, etc But please tell me, does that mean that your 3rd wife's brother's sons need to roll with you? It's not that there isn't any money, it's how they choose to spend it--in this case MAINLY on themselves. Come on, if you could choose your own salary and perks, wouldn't you give yourself the best? But what we see is pure greed. It is true that people need to be compensated according to their talents and job description, but if you are in public service you have an obligation to make choices for the greater good. I know this is a very idealistic concept, but we can make some parts of it reality.
To finish off my commentary on this I want to unleash views from some of our brilliant leaders. Kenyan Finance Minister David Mwiraria has warned that the government may soon have to cut its funding to ministries to cover the costs of the drought. Minister Charity Ngilu said her department could not cope with cuts to the health budget.
"I am urging Mr Mwiraria to instead increase the health budget because I believe that more people will visit health centres and hospitals frequently because of diseases related to famine and drought," Kenya's Daily Nation newspaper quotes Ms Ngilu as saying.
Now, I think anyone can analyze the situation using very basic logic--cause and effect. You could even draw a diagram! So the govt may "soon" cut funds to ministries so they can feed people. Does that sound urgent to you? Does soon mean before the year is over? or perhaps before the next General Election? And did they say Maybe? I don't know what kind of health/medical exposure or background Charity Ngilu has--but once again one doesn't need a degree or work experience to know that if somebody will "visit...hospitals frequently because of diseases related to famine and drought." you are just saying a person is Hungry, famished, starving and NEEDS FOOD AND WATER! So, it does NOT make sense to treat symptoms without looking at the ROOT CAUSE!! Oh well, same old sad story...
Tuesday, January 17, 2006
Wazee, guitars, & music
I have many things I want to write about, so I will probably go off on different tangents.
First of all, on old people...you tend to picture them as warm, grandparent types. And sure, some of them are. But, there are some MEAN OLD PEOPLE. Come on, I know you've lived through a lot of bullshit, world wars, numerous political and scientific changes...etc. But this does not make one a saint. We are all human, and sometimes we get places because of hard work (ours or other people's), or just luck--whatever. I believe that respect is a 2-way street. This concept applies to all aspects of life.I'm sure everyone would agree!
What is it with Americans and guitars? Is it like a rite of passage to take guitar lessons in this country? Because every other person on the street strums a guitar--true, some are really talented. But how about something different? Maybe a tuba or the saxophone? That would just blow me away...of course, piano playing is impressive--even I attempt to bang out a few tunes. I could never make a living doing it--but it's fun. I can read notes and play simple tunes, but I'm not one of those maestros who can hear something and instantly play it in 5 different keys. I don't even play any Chopin. Anyhow, I appreciate music in various forms.
Well, gotta go now and get ready for work.
First of all, on old people...you tend to picture them as warm, grandparent types. And sure, some of them are. But, there are some MEAN OLD PEOPLE. Come on, I know you've lived through a lot of bullshit, world wars, numerous political and scientific changes...etc. But this does not make one a saint. We are all human, and sometimes we get places because of hard work (ours or other people's), or just luck--whatever. I believe that respect is a 2-way street. This concept applies to all aspects of life.I'm sure everyone would agree!
What is it with Americans and guitars? Is it like a rite of passage to take guitar lessons in this country? Because every other person on the street strums a guitar--true, some are really talented. But how about something different? Maybe a tuba or the saxophone? That would just blow me away...of course, piano playing is impressive--even I attempt to bang out a few tunes. I could never make a living doing it--but it's fun. I can read notes and play simple tunes, but I'm not one of those maestros who can hear something and instantly play it in 5 different keys. I don't even play any Chopin. Anyhow, I appreciate music in various forms.
Well, gotta go now and get ready for work.
Monday, January 09, 2006
Thai chicken curry, chemistry, and a great book...
I feel great! Just had delicious, delectable, spicy Thai food with my sis. I got takeout coz it's more comfortable eating @ home. It's so cold outside but we're warm and cozy in here. We have a fab apartment (no more roommate drama! more on that later...). I'm keeping my resolution of starting school. I just registered today and went to the campus to find the classrooms. I am pretty excited about being back in school--mostly because I'm good at it. I was always one of the smartest kids in the class in all the schools I've been to. And I don't say this to be arrogant, my siblings and I are blessed to inherit our parents' brains and intelligence. The thing is when you're younger--it doesn't make you too popular with your agemates. I was definitely a nerdy smart kid. Obviously, I did my work but it's not like I studied all the time; I found most of my classes easy. I mostly read books for pleasure;( they are a MAJOR part of my life). The down side to that is I didn't develop good study skills early--when I started college I was overwhelmed with the amount of study time I needed for classes, and when you add work on top, it is tough! I still managed though and most of my teachers were impressed with my work. But lately, I feel like I've become dumber--like my brain is just vegetating. Granted my job requires a lot of learning and thinking fast on your feet and recalling facts. But there are other aspects of my job that are just common sense and I think to myself "what does studying have to do with this?" Anyway, I hope I get through my Chemistry class because this subject is not my forte!
I have some great books to read which is a wonderful feeling. My world has become a much bigger place because of books. I just read "Maus" by Art Spigelman. A great book, simple reading, and it's a comic! or should I say, graphic novel. Anyway, I recommend it to everyone.
I have some great books to read which is a wonderful feeling. My world has become a much bigger place because of books. I just read "Maus" by Art Spigelman. A great book, simple reading, and it's a comic! or should I say, graphic novel. Anyway, I recommend it to everyone.
Tuesday, January 03, 2006
I hate January
Had the past few days off, now it's back to work tomorrow. January must be the most optimistic yet depressing month of the year. Reality hits you in the face, bills,bills, and more bills. Now is when those credit cards come in handy. Sometimes you've gotta make decions and prioritize: is it to pay the rent? medical/health bills? school fees? All are equally important. You need to live somewhere safe, clean, accessible. Making regular rent payments also gives you good credit so you can qualify for loans, etc. Health is also important or else you won't have the strength to get up and go to jobo and interact with people freely. And if fees are not paid, one has to think of immigration status, Relaz @ home who did harambees, Parents who sacrificed so much for you to "get a good education." It's all heavy stuff. And you also need entertainment funds for when you need to go out and destress, even for just the basics of life: you need to be well groomed and well-dressed. To quote the black dude from 40 yr-old Virgin "I don't look this way by accident" Enyewe, I do believe in God, especially in times like this. I need to or else there's no hope. Damn, life is hard when you don't have a lot of money. Money makes the world go round. The thing is I wonder when will it ever be enough? I've discovered with a bigger paycheck come more responsibilities and obligations. You make more, you've got to spend more. So in a way you're back to square one. This is one of the reasons why I don't want kids. I couldn't handle all the long term responsibility. Seeing all the stuff parents have to do: my parents sacrifices and hard work really make me appreciate them. But I wouldn't be able to do it. And why lie, I do a lot of stuff from a sense of guilt about them. Guilt is not a good motivator though long term. I see a lot of grown ups with their elderly parents when they're sick in hospital or something and when they've flown in from whatever state they live in to see the parents, all worried. I have observed the loving actions the families show, but I can also sense the guilt they have. Many people talk about not seeing their parents for a long time--somewhat neglecting them. Relationships are very complex and they keep changing. I can barely handle the ones I have now, so I'm not about to add a child to the equation. I don't care about my biological clock. I'm not ready to do anything drastic like getting my tubes tied, but the truth is when I think of my life in the future, I can see myself alone or with a significant other, members of my family, friends, but NO CHILDREN. Oh well, time will tell.
Monday, January 02, 2006
New Year, new beginnings
So now the holiday celebrations are dying out...time to sober up and face reality. Usually, I would say to hell with resolutions, but I have to confess that they make sense. It's a chance to have a new beginning--you can distance yourself from the past with time (if you want to). It's about the hopes and dreams we have for our lives. I've finally got a blog of my own! So I can check that off my list. There are a few other things I wanna do this year:
1)Go home to Kenya--I've been away too long. It's the whole thing about time and money--you'll usually have more of one or the other. When going to school, there are summers and holidays off but on a student budget, that ticket may as well cost a million bucks. And then when there's a steady income, there just isn't time to take off coz you've got to put in hours to keep getting those checks. Anyhow, I hate getting that feeling of just floating--like where do I belong? And then you have images of how things were like years ago but I want to see the reality now.
2)Change in work environment and/or hours. Still exploring the options.
3)Get back into school--back to homework, research papers, and spending time around people my age!
4) Gain some weight! oh yeah, you heard that right. I need to eat better and take better care of my body. I went to see a doctor for a check up a month and a half ago and I was shocked when I stood on the scale; I have lost a lot of weight. I have not been this size in years--since high school. I didn't notice at first, people would make comments, then my clothes became loose kind of hanging on me. It's a combination of lifestyle and stress--living the fast life. I know that most people would resolve to do the opposite--and true, that would do some people good. But the bottom line is what's healthy for you? I'm so sick of the obsession to be super skinny--I believe that there are many body types and frames and some people are skinny naturally, others are curvy and big and look fabulous. The fat distribution in your body depends on whether you're male of female, your genes, ...etc
5)Continue to have a sense of fulfillment with my life and goals, keep close to my family and friends and those important to me; nurturing the spiritual side because it matters.
1)Go home to Kenya--I've been away too long. It's the whole thing about time and money--you'll usually have more of one or the other. When going to school, there are summers and holidays off but on a student budget, that ticket may as well cost a million bucks. And then when there's a steady income, there just isn't time to take off coz you've got to put in hours to keep getting those checks. Anyhow, I hate getting that feeling of just floating--like where do I belong? And then you have images of how things were like years ago but I want to see the reality now.
2)Change in work environment and/or hours. Still exploring the options.
3)Get back into school--back to homework, research papers, and spending time around people my age!
4) Gain some weight! oh yeah, you heard that right. I need to eat better and take better care of my body. I went to see a doctor for a check up a month and a half ago and I was shocked when I stood on the scale; I have lost a lot of weight. I have not been this size in years--since high school. I didn't notice at first, people would make comments, then my clothes became loose kind of hanging on me. It's a combination of lifestyle and stress--living the fast life. I know that most people would resolve to do the opposite--and true, that would do some people good. But the bottom line is what's healthy for you? I'm so sick of the obsession to be super skinny--I believe that there are many body types and frames and some people are skinny naturally, others are curvy and big and look fabulous. The fat distribution in your body depends on whether you're male of female, your genes, ...etc
5)Continue to have a sense of fulfillment with my life and goals, keep close to my family and friends and those important to me; nurturing the spiritual side because it matters.
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