After reading Aco's post, I had more than just a comment. So here goes:
I've got to air my views. My definition of a date is spending time together. This covers activities outside the usual dinner and movie routine. The financially challenged should pick activities that don't involve a lot of $$ (hikes, walks, sports). You get real creative when you don't have money to burn on Italian dinners and opera tickets. Some activities are geared towards students but anyone can do them: example, study dates, meet at a bookstore, eat lunch together in the cafeteria, ride bikes, give or get a massage. Whoever initiates the date should usually pay most of the bill--of course the other person should offer to leave a tip or buy drinks. Chics have gotten used to being provided for (living @ home or dating older men), and old habits die hard! Blame it on the Cinderella fairy tale for the crazy idea of a Prince Charming coming to rescue us from ruin. As I said before, that's what happens when you bring up kiddos on fairy tales alone. Give them those hadithis of Kaka Sungura and Abu Nuwasi. Warning to men: women want stability in general but if they love you, they'll work with what you've got.
MEN should be more honest about their life situations: when trying to impress women they flaunt fancy job titles and degrees, the Wall St. company they work for, etc. Many women mistake all these things to mean MONEY! Some prestigious jobs that require education don't pay much. While some blue collar types are raking it in. In the beginning, if one states, "I'm a student making min. wage and getting an allowance from home every 3 months," you can eliminate potential mates from gold-diggers. I know a guy who is the firstborn and supporting his Mom and younger siblings. It's very admirable and any woman who dates and marries the guy needs to know this situation. It will explain his lifestyle. Other men fall back on family achievements to show how wealthy they are, talking about what their father does and property he owns. But don't focus on it too much! Kwani am I going to date you or your father? Some guys overanalyze the numbers: get over the fact that a movie ticket cost $10. It's tacky to talk about your salary endlessly, or ask too many questions about mine.
I've been surprised by some of my peers, young intelligent and attractive guys who have this idea that "My wife will not work, I will provide for her." Sweetie, you may not afford it! If you can't afford that diamond ring (major symbol), you are not ready to commit to that life. And what if the wife makes more and you need the money. A dual income will give you more purchasing power and stability. Many of us have ambitions too. And we may never get married.
The fascination some chics have with white men is sometimes senseless. At home, they're over-glamorized and always perceived as rich. But we can turn it around: what is the fascination Kenyan (and other black) men have with white chics? I went to a couple of schools: high school and early yrs of college with a group of my peers--all the guys (except one) dated white, latin, & asian chics. It was so obvious and the message us black girls got is that these guys didn't find us attractive. That's a blow to our self-esteem, but we dealt. So, we have a school event: people are trying to get dates so a couple of us black girls decide to go with a latin and philipino guy. All of a sudden, the Kenyan guys are doing a double take. Strange how we suddenly became more visible. I'm all for interracial/cultural/tribal dating--many of us do it coz it's a free world with many possibilities. It's natural to crave something new, BUT you gotta have taste! There was a very fine Kiuk guy in high school and half the school had a crush on him. We all waited in suspense to see who he'd pick: no surprise there. We just wonder is it a status thing or true feelings? Junguz are like everyone else, there are fly ones, wack ones, dumb ones and smart ones. Coming abroad, I see a fine Kenyan or Tzian young man with one of those obese jungu mamaz and I'm thinking come on! Of course, tunajua kuna hizo situations, lakini you have a lot of choices. At the end of the day, you lie in your own bed and who am I to stand in your way?
Wednesday, March 29, 2006
Where I've been
During the past 1 week+, I have:
1)Been in a morgue. It's cold in there. All I could see were body bags on cold metal slabs. There's been talk in the news about the Terry Schiavo case. It brought up a lot of issues about the "right to die." People are split left and right about who gets to make the decisions: parents or spouse? pull the plug or pray for a miracle? This argument, like Roe v. Wade, will never be fully resolved. Most of us think about what will happen next. I officially don't believe in hell: I don't believe in the Judeo-Christian (Islam?) hell where sinners will burn for eternity. I don't believe that the soul of a dead person floats around, giving words of wisdom. I believe there are times we hear a person's voice in our head telling us something. We all want to believe that we'll get another chance, so reincarnation is appealing. I don't know if I believe in that. Just imagine that it does happen; so that creepy Science teacher who would hit on girls half his age could come back as a fly or a cockroach--swat! smash! out!
2) Seen a traditional Chinese medicine doctor. I passed by one of those random screenings and decided to stop by--I believe in the holistic approach to wellness and use of Eastern and kienyeji Kenyan herbs. Some of us grew up being forced to eat vegetables and drink various concotions made from various leaves and herbs in our yard--but the stuff works! I admire the quality of being "calm" and most people from that part of the world possess it. I want to learn new methods for stress relief. She was great--encouraged me to try acupuncture. One of my buddies tried it for allergies and she swears it worked. One of these days...
3) Attended a designer trunk show. My first. No big Italian names. A few local designers. Very original work. I saw handbags, jewelry, hats.shirts, handwarmers, underwear--I did a double take on these, they looked comfortable (no thongs!). Maybe someone should make a suggestion to Home Science teachers about changing sewing projects to items that we could actually wear (underwear!) without worrying whether it matches anything else. I fancied myself a designer the first 11 years of my life--making doll's clothes was quite a task! My last year of high school, I stated that my dream was "to become a fashion designer..." Yeah, right. I'm not even close--priorities have changed. I lack the originality and creativity to do it but I still find it fascinating. There was a live performance from a violinist, veggiez & dip, bread & cheese, and Sangria! I enjoyed a cool glass. One of my ex-roomies makes the best Sangria. My only purchase: chocolate truffles.
4) Won a Monopoly match! I am such a nerd--I enjoy playing board games (can't play chess yet). I know it's just a game, but I get very competetive. I had the satisfaction of beating a know-it-all guy from Wisconsin. It was a fun evening: games, pizza, beer, and an interesting mix of people.
5) Hang out with a lesbian couple. Who are planning to get married. Soon. No church ceremony for obvious reasons. Within minutes of meeting them, my gaydar was sending signals about the Latina girl. I wasn't too sure about her friend, an attractive tatooed brunette with a pony-tail and bangs, wearing librarian glasses and punk-rock attire. Unlikely combo that looked hot. The Latina girl was talking about how guys would hit on her girlfriend and she'd be like "She's with me, as in she's my girlfriend. It's definitely a point of pride for them, but I think it must get tiring to continuously defend the relationship. It can also happen with straight couples when you just can't put some people together and you're thinking, "what? they're together?"
6) Been in the same room as 2 full-grown male chinchillas. FYI, they're rodents. They have beautiful soft grey fur and beady eyes, but they're rodents! Apparently one was trying to get with the other one...they're supposed to be monogamous. According to Wikipedia, "This peculiar rodent is also studied by linguists due to its aural range of perception. It is considered the closest to that of a human's." Fascinating fact. I like animals in general, but I will not willingly live with any kind of rodent!
7) Met a couple of WWII veterans. It's amazing to meet people that have lived history and been a part of it. It's scary to imagine living when Hitler was a real threat. Time magazine featured his face with a big X over it in 1945. One of my grandfather's fought with the British in Northern Africa during this war. He would show us pictures and tell us about it when we were kids. Courageous blood flows through my veins. I give respect to those who've survived to tell the story.
8) Skipped class more than once. I used to be the model student. But things like sleep, work, and, yes, laziness, happen. I will stop being judgemental about those students who don't show up to class, or leave early (gotta get to work). You'd never know by looking at some people what their situation is. I still get pissed when people ask, "ya got any kids?" Hell no. There's a young-lookin' white girl @ school who has a 3yr-old kid and she's always hassled, gets late dropping her off, trying to arrange pick-up times, calling her peroz, the baby-daddy is in jail,...so much drama. You never know...I'd better get some sleep if I don't want to miss my morning class. But hey, shit happens!
1)Been in a morgue. It's cold in there. All I could see were body bags on cold metal slabs. There's been talk in the news about the Terry Schiavo case. It brought up a lot of issues about the "right to die." People are split left and right about who gets to make the decisions: parents or spouse? pull the plug or pray for a miracle? This argument, like Roe v. Wade, will never be fully resolved. Most of us think about what will happen next. I officially don't believe in hell: I don't believe in the Judeo-Christian (Islam?) hell where sinners will burn for eternity. I don't believe that the soul of a dead person floats around, giving words of wisdom. I believe there are times we hear a person's voice in our head telling us something. We all want to believe that we'll get another chance, so reincarnation is appealing. I don't know if I believe in that. Just imagine that it does happen; so that creepy Science teacher who would hit on girls half his age could come back as a fly or a cockroach--swat! smash! out!
2) Seen a traditional Chinese medicine doctor. I passed by one of those random screenings and decided to stop by--I believe in the holistic approach to wellness and use of Eastern and kienyeji Kenyan herbs. Some of us grew up being forced to eat vegetables and drink various concotions made from various leaves and herbs in our yard--but the stuff works! I admire the quality of being "calm" and most people from that part of the world possess it. I want to learn new methods for stress relief. She was great--encouraged me to try acupuncture. One of my buddies tried it for allergies and she swears it worked. One of these days...
3) Attended a designer trunk show. My first. No big Italian names. A few local designers. Very original work. I saw handbags, jewelry, hats.shirts, handwarmers, underwear--I did a double take on these, they looked comfortable (no thongs!). Maybe someone should make a suggestion to Home Science teachers about changing sewing projects to items that we could actually wear (underwear!) without worrying whether it matches anything else. I fancied myself a designer the first 11 years of my life--making doll's clothes was quite a task! My last year of high school, I stated that my dream was "to become a fashion designer..." Yeah, right. I'm not even close--priorities have changed. I lack the originality and creativity to do it but I still find it fascinating. There was a live performance from a violinist, veggiez & dip, bread & cheese, and Sangria! I enjoyed a cool glass. One of my ex-roomies makes the best Sangria. My only purchase: chocolate truffles.
4) Won a Monopoly match! I am such a nerd--I enjoy playing board games (can't play chess yet). I know it's just a game, but I get very competetive. I had the satisfaction of beating a know-it-all guy from Wisconsin. It was a fun evening: games, pizza, beer, and an interesting mix of people.
5) Hang out with a lesbian couple. Who are planning to get married. Soon. No church ceremony for obvious reasons. Within minutes of meeting them, my gaydar was sending signals about the Latina girl. I wasn't too sure about her friend, an attractive tatooed brunette with a pony-tail and bangs, wearing librarian glasses and punk-rock attire. Unlikely combo that looked hot. The Latina girl was talking about how guys would hit on her girlfriend and she'd be like "She's with me, as in she's my girlfriend. It's definitely a point of pride for them, but I think it must get tiring to continuously defend the relationship. It can also happen with straight couples when you just can't put some people together and you're thinking, "what? they're together?"
6) Been in the same room as 2 full-grown male chinchillas. FYI, they're rodents. They have beautiful soft grey fur and beady eyes, but they're rodents! Apparently one was trying to get with the other one...they're supposed to be monogamous. According to Wikipedia, "This peculiar rodent is also studied by linguists due to its aural range of perception. It is considered the closest to that of a human's." Fascinating fact. I like animals in general, but I will not willingly live with any kind of rodent!
7) Met a couple of WWII veterans. It's amazing to meet people that have lived history and been a part of it. It's scary to imagine living when Hitler was a real threat. Time magazine featured his face with a big X over it in 1945. One of my grandfather's fought with the British in Northern Africa during this war. He would show us pictures and tell us about it when we were kids. Courageous blood flows through my veins. I give respect to those who've survived to tell the story.
8) Skipped class more than once. I used to be the model student. But things like sleep, work, and, yes, laziness, happen. I will stop being judgemental about those students who don't show up to class, or leave early (gotta get to work). You'd never know by looking at some people what their situation is. I still get pissed when people ask, "ya got any kids?" Hell no. There's a young-lookin' white girl @ school who has a 3yr-old kid and she's always hassled, gets late dropping her off, trying to arrange pick-up times, calling her peroz, the baby-daddy is in jail,...so much drama. You never know...I'd better get some sleep if I don't want to miss my morning class. But hey, shit happens!
Thursday, March 23, 2006
I like...part 2
1. "Have a Nice Day" by Bon Jovi . I love their music! This band is flaming hot and sexy despite their age--who even cares about their age?
2.Korean soap operas. "First Love of a Royal Prince" had me hooked a few months ago. It's set in Seoul and Tahiti. The theme is a love triangle: but it has so many twists in the plot that grip your attention. And the leading men are so fine! Especially Kim Nam Jin. I swear there's a guy @ work who looks a lot like him. I can't help staring when I run into him.
Seoul is now on my list of places to go. There's another soap set in Singapore called "Beautiful Trio." I don't like the Wikipedia definition coz it's summed up as the adventures of 3-man hating bitches. It's about their adventures with men and relationships, as well as work and family. They're all in pursuit of great relationships (not quite Sex and the City). There's one chic who just got out of a rocky relationship and has a fab job but her mother is pressuring her to get married.(It's never enough!) So she gets this guy to pretend he's her boyfriend.It's hilarious!
3. French chocolate truffles.Close your eyes,open your mouth and imagine a chocolate truffle on your tongue...Now, close your mouth and feel the sweet, rich thick brown chocolate melting on your tongue. The mix of cocoa, butter and flavor is just right. I'm gonna have one right now!
4. Comedy. From Redykyulass (what's going on with them lately?), all kinds of stand-up comics (Chapelle, Carlos Mencia, Kings & Queens of Comedy, Eddy Murphy's Raw, and other not-so-famous ones),to SNL and Mad tv (the actor who clowns Dubya is funny!)...comedy central is my channel--guaranteed to put a smile on my face anyday!
Brokeback...part 1
Yeah, I know this movie came out ages ago, but I feel the need to air my views on the issue. I will go on record as follows:
I watched Brokeback Mtn and it's a brilliant, moving film--everyone should see it! Even those who are uncomfortable with homosexuality have to admit that the film's portrayal of 2 attractive married men who express their heart's true desire while juggling their families strikes a chord in any human who has ever loved someone deeply, and then lost them because of family situations, society norms, and other circumstances. (Damn! what a long sentence.) Humans are programmed to have sexual feelings and we express them in different ways.
The debate of "Nature vs Nurture" will go on forever as we all try to figure out "how" it happens. A lot of other people are still in denial about the whole issue thinking it only happens to strange people in a far away country, city, or state. But when something happens closer home--you are forced to change your perspective. Just think for a moment, what if that gay man walking down the street was your best friend or your brother? Or maybe that lesbian co-worker people make fun of was a cousin, or maybe it was you? Many people would say, "Oh hell, no, I know all my friends and cousins, and I sure as hell know what I like!" Perhaps. We all tend to put groups of people together in a box and give them specific labels. When you meet someone who doesn't conform to the label, it's scary to admit that you may be wrong. If you are wrong about this one thing, maybe you have to re-examine your entire belief system. I say that we all need to examine our belief systems and figure out why we believe what we do. And many of us say, "That's how I was brought up." This reason alone doesn't cut it once you survive your angst-ridden youth. It's one thing for a bright-eyed 17-yr old girl to make that statement when she explains why she goes to church every weekend; but it's just pathetic for a 33-yr old man to say it when he explains why he won't stay up to party coz bedtime is 10pm. Now, I'm not attacking choices, but I'm asking everyone to see what's behind them. Maybe it's just me who isn't satisfied with answers like "that's the way it is." I yearn to discover the 'real' story behind the statement. I want to know how one gets there. I'm just going through that stage in life when I'm examining a lot of my beliefs.
A former classmates would share some intimate stories about her marriage (that was falling apart...but that's not the point). She told us that a few years into the marriage, her husband would only get off on freaky things so she'd wear a strap-on when they had sex. We can picture this from many different angles, I'm sure...Lesson for the day: straight people get freaky too!
I watched Brokeback Mtn and it's a brilliant, moving film--everyone should see it! Even those who are uncomfortable with homosexuality have to admit that the film's portrayal of 2 attractive married men who express their heart's true desire while juggling their families strikes a chord in any human who has ever loved someone deeply, and then lost them because of family situations, society norms, and other circumstances. (Damn! what a long sentence.) Humans are programmed to have sexual feelings and we express them in different ways.
The debate of "Nature vs Nurture" will go on forever as we all try to figure out "how" it happens. A lot of other people are still in denial about the whole issue thinking it only happens to strange people in a far away country, city, or state. But when something happens closer home--you are forced to change your perspective. Just think for a moment, what if that gay man walking down the street was your best friend or your brother? Or maybe that lesbian co-worker people make fun of was a cousin, or maybe it was you? Many people would say, "Oh hell, no, I know all my friends and cousins, and I sure as hell know what I like!" Perhaps. We all tend to put groups of people together in a box and give them specific labels. When you meet someone who doesn't conform to the label, it's scary to admit that you may be wrong. If you are wrong about this one thing, maybe you have to re-examine your entire belief system. I say that we all need to examine our belief systems and figure out why we believe what we do. And many of us say, "That's how I was brought up." This reason alone doesn't cut it once you survive your angst-ridden youth. It's one thing for a bright-eyed 17-yr old girl to make that statement when she explains why she goes to church every weekend; but it's just pathetic for a 33-yr old man to say it when he explains why he won't stay up to party coz bedtime is 10pm. Now, I'm not attacking choices, but I'm asking everyone to see what's behind them. Maybe it's just me who isn't satisfied with answers like "that's the way it is." I yearn to discover the 'real' story behind the statement. I want to know how one gets there. I'm just going through that stage in life when I'm examining a lot of my beliefs.
A former classmates would share some intimate stories about her marriage (that was falling apart...but that's not the point). She told us that a few years into the marriage, her husband would only get off on freaky things so she'd wear a strap-on when they had sex. We can picture this from many different angles, I'm sure...Lesson for the day: straight people get freaky too!
Monday, March 20, 2006
Our Actions and Anti-War Protests
People need to start taking responsibility for their actions! Isn't it funny how we are all so quick to point out problems that other people cause without taking the blame for what we do? Of course, this depends on the situation. But I think the principle applies to a wide range of situations: from government leaders and CEOs who remix numbers during financial audits knowing they've just screwed their workers out of a pension, the person taking the order at my favorite Indian restaurant, a lazy ex-roomie who would drink my mango juice and eat another roomie's food, that classmate that copies all your homework answers without asking why and how--then fails the exam, an ex who stands you up and doesn't call right away because they 'misplaced your number,' a miserly former landlady aka S. the bitch who was too cheap to get professional workmen to fix a sink and ceiling leaks on property worth over $0.5 million until she was given an ultimatum, vengeful relatives that promise to take care of somebody's child only to make them suffer and ration their money although it's needed for school fees and personal items, ...and yes, you and me.
It takes real strength of character to admit that you've screwed up, and it happens to the best of us. It could be harmless, but there are times when it will make all the difference in the world.
This past Saturday (18th), multiple protests on the War on Terror/WMDs took place and I got to work a little late coz of traffic. Many streets were shut down, obviously some violence and arrests. Civil disobedience in action! The Police dept, fire dept, and CHP were all working together--they have a tough job. Although they share the same views, a lot of city residents trying to get places were pissed off at the methods the crowd used coz of the inconveniences. I remember being part of a protest march a few years ago in a smaller city. After seeing a movie one weekend (Deliver Us from Eva), we got out and ran into a crowd with huge placards. We talked to somebody and they asked if we wanted to join and our reply was "Sure!" Got to try everything once =) We each got a candle and joined the procession down the street. It ended on a plaza where people made speeches. It was interesting to see the mix of people: hippies with long hair and tie-dyed shirts, mothers with kids, older pot-bellied men, the young tatooed punk-rock crew, some Waspy types, students, and curious people leaving the mall. Shortly a rock band hit the stage with an angry sounding song; all I remember is that it dissed Dick Cheney. It was a peaceful march--but the cops were close by. I don't remember who said that "in a war, there are no winners or losers...everybody suffers." How true and, ultimately, tragic.
It takes real strength of character to admit that you've screwed up, and it happens to the best of us. It could be harmless, but there are times when it will make all the difference in the world.
This past Saturday (18th), multiple protests on the War on Terror/WMDs took place and I got to work a little late coz of traffic. Many streets were shut down, obviously some violence and arrests. Civil disobedience in action! The Police dept, fire dept, and CHP were all working together--they have a tough job. Although they share the same views, a lot of city residents trying to get places were pissed off at the methods the crowd used coz of the inconveniences. I remember being part of a protest march a few years ago in a smaller city. After seeing a movie one weekend (Deliver Us from Eva), we got out and ran into a crowd with huge placards. We talked to somebody and they asked if we wanted to join and our reply was "Sure!" Got to try everything once =) We each got a candle and joined the procession down the street. It ended on a plaza where people made speeches. It was interesting to see the mix of people: hippies with long hair and tie-dyed shirts, mothers with kids, older pot-bellied men, the young tatooed punk-rock crew, some Waspy types, students, and curious people leaving the mall. Shortly a rock band hit the stage with an angry sounding song; all I remember is that it dissed Dick Cheney. It was a peaceful march--but the cops were close by. I don't remember who said that "in a war, there are no winners or losers...everybody suffers." How true and, ultimately, tragic.
Thursday, March 16, 2006
I like...
KBW bloggers get a mention in the Tuesday's Daily Nation. Props to all of you! It's great to know that people are making an impact. My last post was rather lengthy, but it felt good to get it all out. Today was a better day; the philosophy exam wasn't that bad, but I should wait to see my grade before I talk.
Now, here are a few things I like:
-> Waking up to the smell of freshly-brewed coffee and some yummy baked goods. (I baked another cake last night after the first one burned.)
-> A full-body massage. I used to think it was just a ploy to get women to waste time in a spa but it makes you feel great! I highly recommend it to everyone. Haven't had one in a while.
->Pedicures.
->All kinds of books. My dream home has a huge library!
->My big comfortable bed.
->Taking a walk on a sunny day, feeling a light breeze against my skin.
->Comfortable shoes. I don't do the stiletto thing--I lack balance!
Things I detest:
->Automated voice mail systems with 20 numbers to push before you speak to a live human being. I've heard that if you cuss then you'll get connected to a person faster, don't know if that's true.
->Long, boring voice mail on my cellphone (unless it's from immeadiate family members and close friends). I prefer texts and e-mails. I've been guilty of leaving long messages but they're rarely boring.
->Boring forwards that have made rounds on the web, e.g. Bill Gates is sharing his fortune, type your name if you believe in God, share with 10 friends for good luck. Especially from people I haven't seen in years, if you're too lazy to construct 2 simple sentences to ask how I'm doing or update me on any interesting things you've done lately then I don't want to hear from you. And the junk mail for penis enlargement or herbal solutions for an erection--I'm not interested!
->Infomercials with miscellaneous products you never heard about. They are so boring! How deep can a mixer, a thermos, set of knives, or vacuum cleaner be? And who actually watches these things in the middle of the night?--maybe people who stay up late like me? Hmm...maybe they're supposed to put you to sleep!
Now, here are a few things I like:
-> Waking up to the smell of freshly-brewed coffee and some yummy baked goods. (I baked another cake last night after the first one burned.)
-> A full-body massage. I used to think it was just a ploy to get women to waste time in a spa but it makes you feel great! I highly recommend it to everyone. Haven't had one in a while.
->Pedicures.
->All kinds of books. My dream home has a huge library!
->My big comfortable bed.
->Taking a walk on a sunny day, feeling a light breeze against my skin.
->Comfortable shoes. I don't do the stiletto thing--I lack balance!
Things I detest:
->Automated voice mail systems with 20 numbers to push before you speak to a live human being. I've heard that if you cuss then you'll get connected to a person faster, don't know if that's true.
->Long, boring voice mail on my cellphone (unless it's from immeadiate family members and close friends). I prefer texts and e-mails. I've been guilty of leaving long messages but they're rarely boring.
->Boring forwards that have made rounds on the web, e.g. Bill Gates is sharing his fortune, type your name if you believe in God, share with 10 friends for good luck. Especially from people I haven't seen in years, if you're too lazy to construct 2 simple sentences to ask how I'm doing or update me on any interesting things you've done lately then I don't want to hear from you. And the junk mail for penis enlargement or herbal solutions for an erection--I'm not interested!
->Infomercials with miscellaneous products you never heard about. They are so boring! How deep can a mixer, a thermos, set of knives, or vacuum cleaner be? And who actually watches these things in the middle of the night?--maybe people who stay up late like me? Hmm...maybe they're supposed to put you to sleep!
Tuesday, March 14, 2006
Murphy's Law, Taxes and The Way I Am
There's a full moon outside tonight, and that may explain why I had a rough day. Don't even get me started on superstitions coz I do believe in a lot of them! My official outlook on life is pessimistic; but this only concerns my life, I'm optimistic when it comes to other people. Murphy's law was in effect today. Had a slow start this morning due to the weird hazy effect from the sleeping pills I took last night after work. After a shower and a hot mug of coffee, I was ready to face the world. My sis and I ran some errands in the neighborhood then headed to an afternoon appointment with my CPA to get taxes done. I penda this dude coz he got me a healthy return last year; his experience includes a decade working for the IRS. On my way there, I realize that I don't have the folder that has the W2s and a book I was carrying. I'm usually a calm person but I just went into panic mode. I felt like crying and shouting at the same time. Where the hell was the red folder?
We had just been to Safeway to get a sandwich and I remembered placing my folder and book on the counter as I reached into my purse for some money. We had to backtrack instantly--I called the Safeway no. on the receipt--and of course it's one of those annoying automated voice systems--I finally get through to a human being and I describe the folder I misplaced. Thankfully, someone found it and kept it safely. So we go back and collect it. I was very relieved to find everything intact but I was also pissed off coz now I have to rearrange my work schedule so I can get another appointment with the tax guy. I have so many plans for that refund and it may even buy me a ticket home this year. I know I've got to keep things in perspective and look at the bigger picture and all that, BUT sometimes when one thing goes wrong, everything else comes to the surface. Fuck taxes and the whole system in this country! I'm not being entirely rational here, but please humor me. Of course governments have to collect taxes for public services, etc, and it seems reasonable that if you make more, then you should pay more, right? Not necessarily, the extremely wealthy get all kinds of tax breaks and incentives which will increase with time courtesy of Bush and co. Then there are those who are collecting certain benefits that it's not very profitable to put in more than 20 hrs of work per week. Those in the middle really feel the squeeze.
I'm glad I didn't run into anyone with odd questions today coz I would have unleashed some bad vibe. I really get tired of having to explain everything about my life, my country, my accent, and even my hair to random people I run into. Usually, I just grin and bear it coz the conversation may be the only history and geography lesson on Kenya that some people will ever have (note to Pala who says some Kenyans abroad are not representing the country well). The routine usually start when a person tries to pronounce my surname and gets a quizzical look on their face, then asks where I'm from, how I got here, seems surprised that I "speak English so well!" I proceed to confirm that Kenya is not next to Nigeria, English is official, I did grow up there, I didn't have to escape a war, thankfully my family is not starving, it really isn't a huge desert, I am not used to 100 degree heat, I'd starve if I had to run for a living, I choose to keep my hair in a natural afro, I don't know any cannibals, and yes, I've heard all about Jesus--I could teach you a thing or two. Eminem's song "The Way I Am" just expresses my exact feelings when I'm angry; just let me be who I am!
Anyhow, I get back home and decide to cook a healthy meal: ugali, spinach, and some liver. I may not be the world's greatest chef but I can do the basics; after all, I've had years of practice. Both my peroz have the skills. My mother's chapatis are famous in our family. And my Dad (unlike most men in his generation) can confidently enter the kitchen and prepare a mouth-watering meal. Thanks to him, I can cook ugali ya mahindi na ya wimbi equally well. My siblings inherited most of those cooking skills. I wasn't the only girl threatened with the classic lines, "nobody will marry you if you can't cook" or "your husband/in-laws will throw you out if you serve a half-cooked meal." My comeback which I still hold to this day:"maybe I won't get married." Well, one can't deny the power and pleasure of a well-cooked meal (guys take note!); once you move away from home and your on-campus cafeteria you realize it's an essential life skill. (Although I hate the idea of spending my entire life in the kitchen.) Well, I decided to bake a cake too: eggs, butter, cake mix & some water then popped it in the oven. I got caught up cutting the onions and frying the vegez so the cake burned. Then I burned some onions and had to throw them out. Finally it all came together. I sipped on a glass of chilled merlot before we sat down to enjoy the meal. It was a success and I felt better afterwards. Well, I've had worse days for sure but it's rare when I reach the melting point and feel like I have no control. The best laid plans of mice and men....Politics in Kenya remain entertaining, the plot thickens: mercenaries/businessmen, loans, govt. officials, the whole thing is a mess and they all have a responsibility. And is parliament still in recess? I could use a 5 month vacation right about now. My reality: I need to review my notes for a Philosophy mid-term tomorrow and get some sleep:)
We had just been to Safeway to get a sandwich and I remembered placing my folder and book on the counter as I reached into my purse for some money. We had to backtrack instantly--I called the Safeway no. on the receipt--and of course it's one of those annoying automated voice systems--I finally get through to a human being and I describe the folder I misplaced. Thankfully, someone found it and kept it safely. So we go back and collect it. I was very relieved to find everything intact but I was also pissed off coz now I have to rearrange my work schedule so I can get another appointment with the tax guy. I have so many plans for that refund and it may even buy me a ticket home this year. I know I've got to keep things in perspective and look at the bigger picture and all that, BUT sometimes when one thing goes wrong, everything else comes to the surface. Fuck taxes and the whole system in this country! I'm not being entirely rational here, but please humor me. Of course governments have to collect taxes for public services, etc, and it seems reasonable that if you make more, then you should pay more, right? Not necessarily, the extremely wealthy get all kinds of tax breaks and incentives which will increase with time courtesy of Bush and co. Then there are those who are collecting certain benefits that it's not very profitable to put in more than 20 hrs of work per week. Those in the middle really feel the squeeze.
I'm glad I didn't run into anyone with odd questions today coz I would have unleashed some bad vibe. I really get tired of having to explain everything about my life, my country, my accent, and even my hair to random people I run into. Usually, I just grin and bear it coz the conversation may be the only history and geography lesson on Kenya that some people will ever have (note to Pala who says some Kenyans abroad are not representing the country well). The routine usually start when a person tries to pronounce my surname and gets a quizzical look on their face, then asks where I'm from, how I got here, seems surprised that I "speak English so well!" I proceed to confirm that Kenya is not next to Nigeria, English is official, I did grow up there, I didn't have to escape a war, thankfully my family is not starving, it really isn't a huge desert, I am not used to 100 degree heat, I'd starve if I had to run for a living, I choose to keep my hair in a natural afro, I don't know any cannibals, and yes, I've heard all about Jesus--I could teach you a thing or two. Eminem's song "The Way I Am" just expresses my exact feelings when I'm angry; just let me be who I am!
Anyhow, I get back home and decide to cook a healthy meal: ugali, spinach, and some liver. I may not be the world's greatest chef but I can do the basics; after all, I've had years of practice. Both my peroz have the skills. My mother's chapatis are famous in our family. And my Dad (unlike most men in his generation) can confidently enter the kitchen and prepare a mouth-watering meal. Thanks to him, I can cook ugali ya mahindi na ya wimbi equally well. My siblings inherited most of those cooking skills. I wasn't the only girl threatened with the classic lines, "nobody will marry you if you can't cook" or "your husband/in-laws will throw you out if you serve a half-cooked meal." My comeback which I still hold to this day:"maybe I won't get married." Well, one can't deny the power and pleasure of a well-cooked meal (guys take note!); once you move away from home and your on-campus cafeteria you realize it's an essential life skill. (Although I hate the idea of spending my entire life in the kitchen.) Well, I decided to bake a cake too: eggs, butter, cake mix & some water then popped it in the oven. I got caught up cutting the onions and frying the vegez so the cake burned. Then I burned some onions and had to throw them out. Finally it all came together. I sipped on a glass of chilled merlot before we sat down to enjoy the meal. It was a success and I felt better afterwards. Well, I've had worse days for sure but it's rare when I reach the melting point and feel like I have no control. The best laid plans of mice and men....Politics in Kenya remain entertaining, the plot thickens: mercenaries/businessmen, loans, govt. officials, the whole thing is a mess and they all have a responsibility. And is parliament still in recess? I could use a 5 month vacation right about now. My reality: I need to review my notes for a Philosophy mid-term tomorrow and get some sleep:)
Saturday, March 11, 2006
TGIF! ipod nano, & the London School of Economics.
At last! I can finally put my feet up. Had an exhausting day at work, very intense.It's over now so I won't get into it. You know the feeling when you get home at the end of your day, when you leave the cold windy world outside and enter your warm, comfortable abode and sigh, at last...I had a hot shower, changed into pj's, and immeadiately reached for a cold MGD (the best!) and a hot plate of food. Now, highlights from my week:
a) I have an ipod nano! I've wanted one for a long time and thanks to my darling sis for giving me this gift. I never realized its appeal but now I'm hooked; I take it everywhere. One of my fave tunes to relax to is Pachelbel's Canon in D. The violins make me think of butterflies and fairies prancing around an enchanted forest...
b) Got e-mails from some old friends I haven't been in touch with--when you have a great connection with certain people that the mention of their names, or hearing just a few words from them lights up your day and you can't stop smiling=)
Enough has been said about the shameless debacle of Kenyan politics and it's clear that the agenda many leaders had when they were campaigning for votes drastically shifted once they were sworn into office. I am so proud of the numerous Kenyans who had the courage to speak up and demonstrate and call out these tyrannical leaders. And what's this we hear about mercenaries from Eastern Europe? Damn, we even have to export hit men! And I thought there were plenty of homegrown ones. Despite the fact that Kenya is a developing country and freqently features on polls to do with: i)extreme poverty ii) starvation iii) HIV/AIDS iv)corruption v)lack of clean water and other equally depressing things, I strongly believe and know there is a lot of wealth and resources present. It's all about the distribution (I don't need a degree from the London School of Economics to know that). I am not the first person to come up with the idea but why can't those who have millions to throw around spend the money locally so the wealth can trickle down to their fellow citizens? Why outsource when you can do it locally? There's some talk in the news about getting rid of some expats and replacing them with qualified locals...we'll see how that goes. It's sad that many very intelligent visionary professionals are not recognized until they leave and make a name somewhere else where their talents are put to use.
And while many of us look to these intelligent visionary professionals for inspiration, sometimes we esteem them so highly that we forget to put them in their place.Y'all know those people whose attitude is so in your face: "Everybody, stop the world now! I'm very important coz my job is____. I worked on this project/presentation/research study." But just try to coordinate something simple with them and they will turn it into a triathlon for you: you will jump through hoops and go distances in an effort to touch base with them--a very exhausting affair. Those folks who will quickly unleash their business cards for you at some random bash when you're just trying to make idle conversation; going into endless details as you stifle a yawn and glance around the room in an effort to find anybody to rescue you. My reaction? Thanks, but I'm not looking for a business partner or consultant and I don't want to buy whatever crap you're selling so I could care less. But one day, you realize that you want to buy that product and call the person up and they're too damn lazy to drive <15 min to deliver just coz you're not buying an entire shipment. Oh please! We are new customers who could be bankrolling you for the next few years. Talk about bad business skills.(I sure as hell don't need a degree from the London School of Economics to know that!)
My plan for the weekend is to spend quality time with my fab siblings, watch Tsotsi, and get lots of sleep (and study too).
a) I have an ipod nano! I've wanted one for a long time and thanks to my darling sis for giving me this gift. I never realized its appeal but now I'm hooked; I take it everywhere. One of my fave tunes to relax to is Pachelbel's Canon in D. The violins make me think of butterflies and fairies prancing around an enchanted forest...
b) Got e-mails from some old friends I haven't been in touch with--when you have a great connection with certain people that the mention of their names, or hearing just a few words from them lights up your day and you can't stop smiling=)
Enough has been said about the shameless debacle of Kenyan politics and it's clear that the agenda many leaders had when they were campaigning for votes drastically shifted once they were sworn into office. I am so proud of the numerous Kenyans who had the courage to speak up and demonstrate and call out these tyrannical leaders. And what's this we hear about mercenaries from Eastern Europe? Damn, we even have to export hit men! And I thought there were plenty of homegrown ones. Despite the fact that Kenya is a developing country and freqently features on polls to do with: i)extreme poverty ii) starvation iii) HIV/AIDS iv)corruption v)lack of clean water and other equally depressing things, I strongly believe and know there is a lot of wealth and resources present. It's all about the distribution (I don't need a degree from the London School of Economics to know that). I am not the first person to come up with the idea but why can't those who have millions to throw around spend the money locally so the wealth can trickle down to their fellow citizens? Why outsource when you can do it locally? There's some talk in the news about getting rid of some expats and replacing them with qualified locals...we'll see how that goes. It's sad that many very intelligent visionary professionals are not recognized until they leave and make a name somewhere else where their talents are put to use.
And while many of us look to these intelligent visionary professionals for inspiration, sometimes we esteem them so highly that we forget to put them in their place.Y'all know those people whose attitude is so in your face: "Everybody, stop the world now! I'm very important coz my job is____. I worked on this project/presentation/research study." But just try to coordinate something simple with them and they will turn it into a triathlon for you: you will jump through hoops and go distances in an effort to touch base with them--a very exhausting affair. Those folks who will quickly unleash their business cards for you at some random bash when you're just trying to make idle conversation; going into endless details as you stifle a yawn and glance around the room in an effort to find anybody to rescue you. My reaction? Thanks, but I'm not looking for a business partner or consultant and I don't want to buy whatever crap you're selling so I could care less. But one day, you realize that you want to buy that product and call the person up and they're too damn lazy to drive <15 min to deliver just coz you're not buying an entire shipment. Oh please! We are new customers who could be bankrolling you for the next few years. Talk about bad business skills.(I sure as hell don't need a degree from the London School of Economics to know that!)
My plan for the weekend is to spend quality time with my fab siblings, watch Tsotsi, and get lots of sleep (and study too).
Thursday, March 02, 2006
Press Freedom: Letter to Kibaki
Dear President Kibaki,
On March 2, 2006 armed police raided the headquarters and printing plant of the East African Standard Group. In addition to destroying equipment including the printing presses and burning newspapers, they shut down the Kenyan Television Network television station.
This latest attack follows the jailing of three journalists from the East African Standard newspaper, attacks on the Citizen Weekly, and ongoing harassment of journalists by government-sponsored forces.
I urge you to:
- Condemn these attacks in the strongest terms possible.
- Dismiss any member of your government who played a role in the attacks.
- Live up to your promise to support freedom of the press.
Please copy and paste a copy of this letter on your blog. You may alter the wording to suit your needs. Campaign started by Keguro.
On March 2, 2006 armed police raided the headquarters and printing plant of the East African Standard Group. In addition to destroying equipment including the printing presses and burning newspapers, they shut down the Kenyan Television Network television station.
This latest attack follows the jailing of three journalists from the East African Standard newspaper, attacks on the Citizen Weekly, and ongoing harassment of journalists by government-sponsored forces.
I urge you to:
- Condemn these attacks in the strongest terms possible.
- Dismiss any member of your government who played a role in the attacks.
- Live up to your promise to support freedom of the press.
Please copy and paste a copy of this letter on your blog. You may alter the wording to suit your needs. Campaign started by Keguro.
Wednesday, March 01, 2006
Fuck the Paparazzi!
I'm so pissed off because I have just discovered some pictures of me and my friends posted online. We are fully clothed and (mostly) sober but that's not the point. The point is the people (ex-schoolmates and now former 'friends') who took the pictures did NOT inform us that they would post on them on their website. I will no longer use the term friend to refer to either one of this people again because that is something a REAL friend would never do. Technology has made our lives better but at the same time complicated it a million times. These days every other person is carrying a digital camera and it's a great thing--but please do not take a picture of me if:
a) you don't know me
b) you don't warn me or ask my permission. These are liberties I grant only to those who share the same blood/ DNA or have known me for years.
And even worse, don't post it on your tired website! I just have to vent about these former 'friends': one chick is going out with a sweet-talking jamaa; now this jamaa was seriously hitting on a mutual friend--when the chick was informed she refused to believe it and therefore sacrificed a friendship that had lasted for years. It was very clear to all of us that her relationship was her only priority and friends were secondary so we gave them space. I'm very loyal to my buddies so if somebody doesn't treat them right, then I'll stay away from them. Anyway, time goes by. I never see these people so I don't care what they're doing. Then one day, we all meet at a public function and, being the mature people that we are, say hello and catch up kidogo. Actually, we couldn't avoid them--they came to us with lots of sike. Then someone unleashes a camera and yells 'smile!' 'lean closer.' The flashes go off....somebody introduces their boyfriend saying that they're into organizing events, have a website, blah, blah, blah. Frankly, I've heard this a million times--I'm not putting down the people who do this kinda thing (coz it does take talent and organization) but it seems like 50%-80% of the Kenyan population abroad is doing it. Don't quote me on the figures. In any major metropolitan area across the U.S. there are at least 2 or more Entertainment groups. DJ is a title many aspire to but few demonstrate the skill--it takes more than just playing your fave dance tunes from your iPod/CD collection. Anyway, you know how sometimes you dislike people and stay away from them for so long that you even forget why? Then one day, you give them a chance but they do something shitty right away and then you know "this is why I cannot get along with this person." That's how I feel about the people who posted my pic.
I am a very private person (painfully shy through high school and then became more outgoing) and I'm selective about the people I allow into my inner circle--we all learn through experience. My image is important to me (I'm sure y'all agree)--I confess that I google myself every now and then to see what shows up. I really wouldn't mind having a fabulous pic of myself online if I liked the way I looked in it, and no pics with beer please (some of us grew up in conservative christian homes); don't want to shock the folks @ home. For real, if you spend time around dumb people, who are unambitious and don't care about anything--it will start to rub off on you. So I'm gonna stay away from people with too much drama; I just want a simple life. Stay away from me you paparazzi!
a) you don't know me
b) you don't warn me or ask my permission. These are liberties I grant only to those who share the same blood/ DNA or have known me for years.
And even worse, don't post it on your tired website! I just have to vent about these former 'friends': one chick is going out with a sweet-talking jamaa; now this jamaa was seriously hitting on a mutual friend--when the chick was informed she refused to believe it and therefore sacrificed a friendship that had lasted for years. It was very clear to all of us that her relationship was her only priority and friends were secondary so we gave them space. I'm very loyal to my buddies so if somebody doesn't treat them right, then I'll stay away from them. Anyway, time goes by. I never see these people so I don't care what they're doing. Then one day, we all meet at a public function and, being the mature people that we are, say hello and catch up kidogo. Actually, we couldn't avoid them--they came to us with lots of sike. Then someone unleashes a camera and yells 'smile!' 'lean closer.' The flashes go off....somebody introduces their boyfriend saying that they're into organizing events, have a website, blah, blah, blah. Frankly, I've heard this a million times--I'm not putting down the people who do this kinda thing (coz it does take talent and organization) but it seems like 50%-80% of the Kenyan population abroad is doing it. Don't quote me on the figures. In any major metropolitan area across the U.S. there are at least 2 or more Entertainment groups. DJ is a title many aspire to but few demonstrate the skill--it takes more than just playing your fave dance tunes from your iPod/CD collection. Anyway, you know how sometimes you dislike people and stay away from them for so long that you even forget why? Then one day, you give them a chance but they do something shitty right away and then you know "this is why I cannot get along with this person." That's how I feel about the people who posted my pic.
I am a very private person (painfully shy through high school and then became more outgoing) and I'm selective about the people I allow into my inner circle--we all learn through experience. My image is important to me (I'm sure y'all agree)--I confess that I google myself every now and then to see what shows up. I really wouldn't mind having a fabulous pic of myself online if I liked the way I looked in it, and no pics with beer please (some of us grew up in conservative christian homes); don't want to shock the folks @ home. For real, if you spend time around dumb people, who are unambitious and don't care about anything--it will start to rub off on you. So I'm gonna stay away from people with too much drama; I just want a simple life. Stay away from me you paparazzi!
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