Happy Halloween!

"Tonight is the night that goblins howl..." this is a line from some poem we read in primo years ago. Well, I'm obviously not out partying tonight, didn't even get a costume. It's fun seeing all the costumes, especially the kids who really seem to enjoy it. And all the free candy, wow. When I was a kid, sweets and chocolates were the center of the world. Usually we'd buy cheap sweets when we got some money (patco, co's) moving up to klm, eclairs, then mintchoc, fudge, and dairy milk. We'd even stick a spoon in the sugar bowl and eat it when parents were away from home. When some kid stole money, you could always tell. They went to the local shop and bought lots of chocolates and brought them to school. Then everyone wanted to be their friend. These days, I'm seriously cutting back my sugar intake although I indulge in quality chocolate every now and then. I did go to a Halloween bash over the weekend. House parties are one of my favorite places to be. The people who hosted it did a great job decorating their spacious house. Most people wore costumes (I guess the rest of us didn't get the memo). They had a keg and a local rock band performed. They reminded me of Green Day. Totally cool!

Elsewhere in the country, looks like people were inspired by the hood. A frat party at Johns Hopkins is under fire for their themed party. Kwani these guys didn't read the news when UT Austin students had their party? Of course, the customary apologies will be made as PR pros scramble behind the scenes to assemble some politically correct releases to appease the civil rights organizations and their African American students. While these 'hood parties are insulting, I think we need to step back and see them in their true light: the party is merely the symptom for the greater issues that pervade society concerning race and social class. When people apologize, what are they sorry for? Are they sorry for insulting people? Do they even understand why people are pissed off? Are they sorry they got caught and exposed to the world? Will this change their way of thinking or behavior? It's kind of like whenArnold Schwarzenegger apologized for was making a comment about a Latina colleague saying she's hot-tempered because of her 'black blood' and 'latino blood.' Was he embarrassed for making the comment or that the recording was made public?
Just caught a glimpse of Dr. Phil on tv featuring unfaithful couples, and I'll quote a question he asked. "Are you sorry that you did it or sorry that you got caught?"

Visionaries

I attended a great lecture this evening on leadership and visionaries that was very inspiring. It was given by the CEO of a consulting company (our teacher's buddy) and when she described what they do I was thinking "I'd love to work for you!" Well, still have a ways to go before I get there.

One of the more immediate tasks is rewriting a paper on policy. It's a group thing: one dude had written it previously but refused to listen to our feedback and didn't incorporate the research I'd worked on. We were running out of time, so we decided to just hand it in. Big mistake, 'cause now we have to redo it. This dude just doesn't understand why the paper was a disaster and furthermore wants to rewrite it. I handed him the old paper with the teacher's comments so he could see it for himself, and then the new outline I've worked on. There's no way I'm getting a bad grade because somebody with poor writing skills and grammar refuses to listen. The rest of us group members have split up the tasks but he's the only one who's out of line. What bothers me more isn't just the skills (or lack thereof) but the attitude. I will respect people for their work skills and life experience (you've gone through a lot by the time you're twice my age) but when we get to class, we're all students trying to learn.

I've been reading about a visionary: Ella Baker, a cofounder of the Young Negroes' Cooperative League in New York which believed that youth were essential to social change so the members were 35yrs old and younger. If someone older wanted to join, they had to get a majority vote from the current members. I like this idea! In fact, if I were to found a party or organization, I'd adopt the same rule: 35 and younger only. Of course, if you're older than that, but have similar values and goals and the members approve, you can join and be consulted for your expertise. Wouldn't this be brilliant?

(a few minutes later...)

Well, looks like somebody else beat me to it: the Madaraka Party of Kenya just got registered this month. I just found out about them a few minutes ago. Let me read up on them.

Same Old Story

Had a fun weekend. Ate great food in my new 'hood. I'm one of those people who rarely tries something new unless it's recommended by a friend. If I eat out, I'd rather go somewhere familiar where I know exactly what to expect. Call me boring if you like but I prefer predictability and stability. Hmm, why do I sound like one of the Controllers in Brave New World? Anyway, if someone else comes up with a new idea, I'll try it.

I ran into a Kenyan buddy on campus and we chatted over coffee. I like the feeling of knowing somebody when I go somewhere so I don't feel so lost. I even met a Kenyan lady over there on Friday. I spotted her wearing a beautiful kitenge and complimented her on it then introduced myself. Funny how you can usually identify your own people. There are times when people fail to identify where I'm from and I get somewhat offended.

My history/ethnic studies class had a very heated debate today on hate crimes and racism. It's great to discuss these sensitive issues that are often brushed aside in day-to-day interaction although they affect our world. Knowing that other people are dealing with similar challenges validates my feelings and I've realized how some well-meaning white people are ignorant about the issues the rest of us face. Hell, ignorance also exists among the non-white/'minority' group. Let me just say for the record that I strongly dislike the term 'minority' for its minimizing, demeaning connotations. Anyway, there are times people see or hear something happening and think "it has nothing to do with me" but wasn't it MLK Jr. who said "An injustice anywhere is an injustice everywhere"? Although we should not delude ourselves with a Messiah complex of saving the world, we do need to be aware of what goes on and to speak up whenever we can. If you hear somebody say something mean or ignorant, call them out on it. There are times I just ask "What do you have against that group of people?" Some people are in positions to exert a lot of influence, others are just in 'survival' mode trying to hold their own shit together. I think that sometimes the most we can do is to challenge our own beliefs and biases and be aware of how that affects our interaction with others so we aren't guilty of the same crimes as the oppressors. This applies to racism, tribalism, gender-based stereotypes, ethnocentrism, and just about any of those -isms.

On the political front, Obama is the golden child of U.S. politics. With good reasons too. The Kenyan leaders who had the balls to criticize his University of Nairobi speech risked alienating a powerful ally who articulated what the Kenyan people have been saying for years. He refused to smear his dignity from the low blows thrown his way by our disgruntled leadership. Isn't it funny how we are so quick to claim him as one of our own when his star is rising, yet neglect the important facts that are right in front of our eyes? He is an American citizen, lawyer, and politician fathered by a Kenyan man. He speaks the truth in stating we should stop waiting to be rescued by the West because they're only watching out for their own interests. A brief look at history should teach us that lesson. Oh well, new day, same old story.

Mini Mid-week Meltdown

Last week, I was overwhelmed with school/ work commitments. I was thinking about dropping my speech forensics class to I can have more time to devote to my major classes which aren't going as well as they should. It's that feeling you get when you're 1 or 2 steps behind and struggling to catch up. I hate it! Thing is, I had to make the decision fast because I had to take part in an intercollegiate speech tournament over the weekend. At first, I thought the class would be simple (no papers, no tests) but then I freaked out about having to be in a tournament. It is no easy task and involves research and preparation, memorizing, and learning how to give the speech. I can deal with people one-on-one but I hate being the center of attention on stage. I took a basic speech comm. class over 2 years ago so I was out of practice. I don't like to do things unless I know I can do them well and excel. Did I mention that my school's team always wins awards at these events? After a lot of encouragement, I decided to go for it. All the travel arrangements had been made so we set out on Friday. It was fun travelling with the Speech & Debate team in the school van with our teacher driving. It reminded me of field trips in high school.

Fast-forward to the actual event. It's a parallel universe that I never knew about till recently. You know how people who are into beauty pageants, horse racing, or chess are really into it? They devote years of their lives to being good and attend all these events that mean little to the rest of us. There's something similar with the Speech tournament. Some people have been doing it since primo, or high school. The dramatic verses remind me of Kenya Music Festival. If you're in debate, you can wear jeans but we had to dress up for the speeches. (Rant: For chics, it's a pain finding dressy shoes that are comfortable and look good. I went shopping for shoes and you wouldn't believe how hard it is to find a pair of flat, black, dressy, closed-toe & heel shoes. I swear, they make shoes for people who's objective is just to have pretty looking feet. How about the rest of us who walk and need shoes to fit into our active lives?) The unofficial uniform is a black pin-striped suit. Well the good news is I survived it. I was very surprised to get an award in the novice category especially because I didn't even make it to the final rounds. Anyhow, I talked to my advisor today and she's great. I've decided to just hang in there with the classes.

Elephants

I just read this article: An Elephant Crackup? in the NY Times and I'm amazed at the similarities humans and elephants share.

Wretched

2 nights ago, I had a hard time going to sleep. I was physically exhausted but my mind just wouldn't take a break. And of course, I had to be up very early the next day for work. I made it there and got through a hectic day fueled by large amounts of caffeine, sugar, adrenalin, and youthful energy. It was a long, long day....Fast forward to the end, was supposed to meet up with someone to go to a live music show, but they 'forgot' to tell me that they weren't going to make it till an hour and a half before the show. I was too tired to be pissed at that moment, and was actually relieved that I could spend my evening at home. But also irritated with the last minute message. It's slightly better than being stood up at when you've dressed up and left the house, but come on, if you are in city A that's a day's drive from city B (the venue), of course you're not going to make it to the damn show! I want people to value and respect my time.

I am currently reading "The Wretched Of The Earth" by Frantz Fanon (recommended by who else but my history teacher:). I'm still in the first Chapter 'On Violence' and I'm so excited by the reading. Sartre has penned a powerful preface. It is such an exhilarating feeling to see these thoughts, observations, and experiences put into powerful words. I'm wondering why I never read this book before. I strongly recommend it to everybody out there.

To be or Not to be Greek

Yes, it is possible to be surrounded by a crowd yet feel utterly alone. It is also possible to look like you fit in, yet feel completely out of place. What the hell am I talking about? Attending an event last week hosted by the Black Sororities and Fraternities at my school.

It all began one afternoon when someone handed me a flyer that stated there was an event scheduled in a couple of days to inform us about Black Greek life at the university. I absently shoved the flyer into my backpack noting the time 6pm and place. When the day came, I was at the library finishing up a paper. I glanced at my watch and thought why not? I decided to make a conscious effort to step out of my comfort zone. Well, I realized that there's a lot I don't know or understand in African American history and culture so I've decided to learn more and get exposed to it. So, this is how the evening went.

5:45pm--I leave the library and stroll to the student center where the event will take place.
5:50pm--I'm sitting outside the meeting hall, there are a few people standing outside.
6:00pm--More people arrive. It's fun to see the clothes, and hairdos. Like a mini-fashion show with some really hot men and fine chics of course.
6:10pm--It's obviously not starting on time, so I decide to check phone messages.
6:20pm--I call a buddy to chat.
6:30pm--The door to the hall is opened and people start to enter. There's a sign that says the event was scheduled for 6:30.
6:35pm--I enter the hall, most of the people are inside. There's a dj spinning music near the stage.
6:37pm--I sit down at the end of a row, so I can make a quick exit. I observe the crowd: young, vibrant intelligent black college students, cracking jokes with friends and dressed to the nines. I must have missed the memo that said to dress up and carry a cute handbag,
6:40pm--There's a tall girl up front who reminds me of a friend. I'm looking around at the different groups and think "This would be so much fun if my old buddies were here." I'm getting that 'new kid at school' feeling 'cause I am. The last 2 schools I attended (1 in Kenya and 1 here) I already knew a bunch of people and had buddies I'd grown up with and a sibling.
6:50pm--A girl with a strong, voice steps up to the podium and directs us to stand up for the Black National Anthem. Her voice blows me away--powerful. I've never heard the song before.
6:55pm--A line-up of the Greeks are on stage and they give us quick blurbs about their group founders, history, and mottos. Everytime a name is mentioned, the members in the crowd give a special yell or cheer. Some people are dressed up in their official colors. The best outfits are red and black. I could see myself in that...
7:10pm--Question and answer session on how to join (there's a 'process', no hazing), what community activities they're involved in, and parties they host,...etc
7:25pm--I leave the building and the event is going strong. Got to be up early the next day.
8:30pm--Home. Hot meal. Comfort.

Brains

My brain was fried today.
It started out with an exam with 138 questions. All multiple choice. I'm one of those students that dives into the exam and leaves the class as soon as possible. I've learned that my first instinct is usually the right one, and if I don't know the answers, sitting around agonizing over them won't help. Next was history class, which is the most enjoyable (usually). Today, I left class with a headache. You know how there's always 1 or 2 people who always have something to say in class? Well, there's one girl who was dominating the discussion. Irritating voice, repeats the same thing over and over again. Well, what's the point in complaining? I guess the rest of us can speak up if we want to. I'm not a big talker in big classes, but if it's a small group I'm more comfortable sharing my views. The bright spot in the day was seeing the teacher (my crush on him is wearing off...). As soon as class was over I headed home for a good meal, Tylenol, and much needed rest (avg. sleeping time over the weekend was maybe 8-10 hrs? I get very grouchy without quality sleep.)

Tomorrow, there's a paper due in my policy class. It's supposed to focus on policies and advocate a position but all it does is focus on general background information with only one paragraph devoted to policy. First of all, it's a group paper but one dude wrote the bulk of it. The rest of us did some editing and additions but the dude doesn't listen to most of the suggestions. I got tired of people talking about what should be done, so last week I did some research and typed in a lot of good information. But my info is missing from the final paper. This idea of writing group papers was a bad idea. We'd better not get a bad grade. Anyway, we're going to meet early afternoon for a final edit of the paper. I have worked in many groups and teams and realized that every person is just watching out for themselves. You have to deal with egos and most people feel like they're the most brainy. In the next phase of my life, I'm thinking about getting into something where I can do my work solo 'cause it's tiring dealing with people and their idiosyncrancies.

A Girl Like Me

Color is more than skin deep for young African-American women struggling to define themselves.

A Doggie's Life

Sometimes, I feel like I'm twice my age--today is one of those days. My joints are aching and every step I take makes me feel old. A warm shower and lots of rest will probably make me feel much better.

I don't know if this is another sign of getting older, but all of a sudden I notice kids who are out late, or just hanging out and think "Shouldn't they be home sleeping? Where are their parents?"

Being a dog is usually a negative thing, but what if you were a real one? As in, you were somebody's pet and experienced a life of luxury? Check out this article on A Dog's Life.

I swear, there are animals in this world that live better than humans (esp. in this country). I didn't understand this concept till I saw it with my own eyes. There's one lady I used to work for in my former school and her family owned 2 cats. Those things were humongous! Don't know if they feed them some kind of genetically modified food or something. Anyhow, those pets were pampered like babies. There was a pet shop nearby that sold those cute little doggie clothes and a variety of pet supplies. There was even a book about how to interpret a cat's 'meows.' It was one of those stores where if you have to ask the prices, then you probably can't afford much. I'm all for animal rights, but I don't think they should be treated like little humans. But then again, who am I to judge owners who indulge themselves through their pets? After all, who else will give you their entire heart so willingly, and spend their entire life with you, offering protection, love, and sincere devotion if not Fido, Simba, or Rafiki?

Packing... and Private Lives

The past weekend has been filled with the hassle of moving. You don't realize how much stuff you have until you try to pack it all up. My books were the heaviest things and took up the most space. We threw out a lot of things and gave away others. Also took stuff to Goodwill. If only there was an affordable way to send things to Kenya....I used to be amazed at how people in the States would throw away everything (including working electronics) but now I understand. Most times, moving or storing stuff costs more than the value of the items. When it comes to electronics, there's always something new so if you hang onto things, they become obsolete. The main thing I want is a house of my own where I can keep my crap in forever and ever. I'm going to make it happen. Meanwhile, just dealing with daily challenges.

Funny how when you need help, the people you least expect come through for you. I'd rather have 1 or 2 friends I trust completely rather than a crowd that only hangs around during good times. One of my close friends lives in my new 'hood so we'll be hanging out more often.

Overheard today on campus (one guy to his friend):"I don't find her repulsive, I'm just not attracted to her." How would you tell someone that you're not into them? Is there a polite way to do it or do you just ignore them and hope they figure it out? I recently bumped into a guy I had a huge crush on 2 years ago. Whatever I used to see in him isn't there anymore. He used to be much cuter.

And why exactly is the public concerned about Condoleeza Rice's love life? I've heard some jokes on tv about her. Women (esp. unmarried ones) are always subject to scrutiny of their love lives. Kwa nini? Take another public figure, e.g. Dick Cheney. His hunting escapades have been a source of entertainment for everyone. Yet, you never hear anything about his wife. (Does he have one? I don't know) The only woman connected to him that we hear about is his lesbian daughter. Society should let women keep their private lives away from the public.

Looking Back

Thursday night was a blast! Made it to all 3 events, and even stopped for a drink at a favorite spot. They served some really good white wine at the gallery (I'm a fan of red) and the exhibit was great. The artist's strength was his charcoal drawings of humans--they were so detailed and life-like. Artists must study human anatomy to be able to capture the human form so well. Didn't Leornado da Vinci himself study cadavers? Well, I got to meet the artist and ask about his inspiration, which is spirituality. The crowd was a mix of business-types getting off work, artists, a backpacker who wandered by, and one punk-rock type chic who stood out from the crowd. It's fun to observe the people. You can usually tell the serious buyers: this time it was an old jungu man pointing at a piece on the wall and asking for a closer look. Afterwards, passed by the fundraiser to see the buddy who invited me. Then proceeded for a drink before hitting the club. It was a memorable night. By the way, why is it that if a chic goes somewhere with a guy, some people just assume you're together?

The weekend was also eventful: it included going clubbing with some workmates (the dj sucked, played music bila formula), a delicious dinner at a popular restaurant, a midnight birthday celebration with champagne and cake (yum), phone call from Dad, working for 12 hrs straight after 2 hours of sleep, and scrambling to type a paper due Monday morning.

There's so much reading to do for classes so I need to work on time management. Will be changing the work schedule. It's hard to readjust to school after being away for a while but I keep reminding myself that I used to be good at it. It seems like the teachers are really into assigning group projects. I have mixed feelings about this. The ethnic studies class has the most interesting material. I'm glad I got in and I look forward to class. The teacher is great (and did I mention good-looking?). He is so passionate and engaging that time flies by.

On the down side, I'm anxiously waiting for a decision from somebody. I'll find out in about 12 hrs. And my piano will be going to a new home. Can't take it when I move, plus I've come to the cruel realization that since I haven't become a concert pianist already, it will never happen. So, a real musician deserves to have it. Funny how you get attached to things. I can't handle a pet 'cause I'd fall apart if he/she died like Acolyte's roommate's dog did last week (See Roadkill...).

Currently listening to: "Sexy Love" by Ne-yo and "Los Angeles" by Sugarcult (free on iTunes) and watching: Korean soaps.

Going Out

I've got 3 invitations for events happening tonight and I've been deciding which ones I'll attend. Wish they were spread out so I could do them all. There are days when I'm sitting at home searching for something fun to do, and nobody feels like going out. Granted I have an odd schedule. I work weekends these days so I don't go out when most people do.

First there's an art gallery opening. I appreciate all kinds of art although I don't understand them all. I have deep admiration for artists and their talents. I won't miss this one. Entrance is free, and throw in some wine and cheese making it a great evening. Then, there's a fundraiser. There'll be live music and dancing. It costs more than I usually pay for an evening of entertainment so I assume there's dinner and drinks included. And it is for a good cause. Don't think I'll make it though 'cause a buddy invited me to go to a club I've wanted to check out for a while. There are different theme nights and ladies get in for free, so why not? Well, I'm gonna have fun so I'd better get ready!

American Dream or Nightmare?

I'm so pissed off! I just lost a huge part of the post I wrote, and I can never recreate all those beautifully written words so first, here's something I wrote last year.

❝If there's really an "American Dream" then there must be an "American Nightmare." And today I've seen it in the form of a rude Mexican woman working the slot machines at the Las Vegas McCurran Airport. Her heavily made-up face has an impatient look, and the kohl-lined eyes stare back with contempt. Her uniform is a black shirt with "CHANGE" printed clearly on it paired with black jeans. She lugs around a fanny pack full of coins. She's the kind of person you meet and instantly forget. She, like millions around the world, left their home country in search of a better life in this wealthy country--the U.S. of A. In many ways, a person like this is considered a success: has a job, apartment, drives a car, gets an income in dollars ...is independently living in another country ...and yet we must question, is this it?

Is it worth it leaving our homes, our families, our ancestors' birthplace, a place where we can freely practice our culture and blend in with our fellow countrymen; a place where you hear the sweet sounds of your mothertongue, where you feel part of a community and where you are seen as a full fledged member of society instead of being abruptly dismissed as another "minority" statistic?❞


Recently, I met a gentleman whose success in life has been proof of "The American Dream." He started out as a clerk in the company, worked his way up, and years later became the owner. I was impressed to hear about this first-hand experience and I told him that. Then he proceeded to tell me about his son who was even more successful. The son ran his own business, built it from the ground up until it was thriving. Then a man approached this son and offered to buy the business. The answer was, "It's not for sale." The man persisted saying, "Anything is for sale at the right price," and quoted a price the son couldn't refuse.
So, the son took the cash, bought a vineyard, built a beautiful home, and enjoyed the fruits of his labor. End of story, right? Wrong! The business went downhill within a year and lost a lot of money, so there was a knock on the son's door, begging him to go back. After considering the incentives, he took on the challenge and proceeded to rebuild the business back to its former glory. Then he sold the business a second time, banked a fortune and retired at the ripe age of....38.

The moral of the story? There are several, but the one that stuck in my mind is that you don't become outrageously wealthy by working for somebody else and waiting for a paycheck (there are a few exceptions). Those who have an idea or product that they build up, invest in, and take risks with stand to reap all the profits. I've heard the idea before, but now I've seen the evidence. So, I just added "start and run a business" to my list of ambitions.

Hair Politics

I am seriously thinking about shaving my head and keeping my hair really short. By the way it's natural. It takes so much energy and time to style it that I'm wondering why I bother. I don't want to relax it (been there) or loc it (not ready for the commitment) at this time.

Pros:
1. Less time getting ready in the morning and more sleep.
2. No dealing with the pain of a freshly braided scalp with tight braids, or the extreme heat when getting it straightened.
3. More money to spend on other things. Getting hair done in the States involves a lot of cash.
4. Being mistaken for a lesbian.
5. Proving to myself I can do things my way, regardless of what everyone else does.


Cons:
1. Showing my not-so-smooth head, not a flattering look.
2. Exposing my scalp to the elements, esp. when it gets cold.
3. Getting asked questions about why I cut it.
4. Being mistaken for a lesbian.
5. Not being able to get that sleek, corporate look. ( Why do I even care? I don't work in the corporate world.)

India.Arie's song featuring Akon, "I am not my hair" has a powerful message that many of us identify with. Our natural attributes just aren't good enough for the mainstream because caucasian features are the standard of attractiveness. Images in the media and pop culture prey on our insecurities, or even create doubt where there's none. There's always something we can do to our skin, bodies, and hair.
Disclaimer: I am not one of those individuals that subscribe to the idea that everything should be natural--you know those that don't believe in waxing, tweezing, or shaving the appropriate body areas. On the contrary, I encourage and take part in those services.

When I go to work, depending on what my current hairstyle is, I get a lot of comments and questions about it. (Compliments too!) I guess some of the people haven't seen Afro hair up close and personal. They don't understand the different things we do to it. Some are fascinated--they don't realize maintenance is so much work. I don't mind answering those who are genuinely curious but I get tired of it too. Anyway, I just have to air my frustration with dealing with my hair. I have an appointment with the hairdresser tomorrow so I'll do something. Let's see what happens.

Blog Day 2006

I have to confess that I usually focus on reading blogs in KBW (which inspired me to start my own). But, I've realized that it's a huge world and we learn more about each other by interaction. A blog is a very personal view of people's lives and experiences. I'd like to share a few I discovered.

1. Sayesha's world
This blog is written by an Indian girl living in Singapore. Not only is she an excellent writer, but also entertaining and witty. Topics range from work and friends, to travel and cultural views. I like the personal insight offered. Despite being in a different part of the world, I identify with a lot of the issues discussed.

2. Margaret Cho
This blog is funny. After all, it belongs to a comedian. Margaret Cho is of Korean ancestry, born and raised in the U.S. Many of her posts are enlightening and address political issues directly.

3. A Family in Baghdad
This is an invaluable look at the reality of living in war-torn Iraq as experienced by a family in Baghdad. It's portrays what we may never see or hear on the news.

Moving

Moving is a bitch.
We've all been through it. First, you start out with a long list of requirements. Then go out on the exciting search for apartments. Depending on the budget, area, and rental market, you may have to adjust some requirements. It's really stressful! Do you pay more for convenience and a quicker commute? Or opt for affordability further out? The nice neighborhoods will always cost more. Is it worth it saving $$ to live in a sketchy area (even if it's temporary)? The idea of living in a high-crime area that's regularly featured in the news is not appealing at all. On the other hand, paying a fortune just because a celeb and some millionares live in the area code isn't practical. The hunt is on....

School has started, and I have a crush on one of my teachers! He's young, Latin, and very eloquent. It's a history/ethnic studies class. I got into class late today and it was so full that some of us were standing in the back. I'm not even registered for it, still on the waiting list. Well, I hope to get in 'cause it seems very interesting.

I went back to my first post of the year dated January 2nd and I'm glad to say that I am fulfilling some of my resolutions. Right now I'm focusing on getting a ticket home for Christmas. Haven't been home in years and I've vowed that I need to go this Christmas. So I've gotta make the sacrifices and hope it works out.

A Pint or Two

There's something great about going out for a drink after work. With workmates. Although intoxication often gets a bad rap (with valid reasons-- e.g. damage to your liver), it has the amazing power of bonding people together. You know that straight-laced colleague who barely cracks a smile? Imagine how friendly they get after a couple of pints...Or imagine how relaxed you get after sipping on that ice-cold drink. Letting down inhibitions once in a while can be healthy--now, I'm not talking about walking up nude a day or two later on a strange yacht (somebody's real life experience by the way) sandwiched between 2 hairy dudes, or chics for that matter. I'm talking about saying exactly what's on your mind at the moment and expressing those innermost thoughts that go 'round and 'round your head. It seems like saying some things out loud make them more real. Some of us are constantly in the position of being a middleman/coordinator/diplomat that we may not say exactly what we think or perhaps we do it in a gentle way. Not because we are cowards or lack the balls, but because we see the bigger picture and realize that personal pride or the smugness of stating "I told you so" is short-lived. Sacrificing individual gain for communal benefit or using the teleological approach of focusing on the end result can motivate us in our labors. I know what that means, do you?

Karma

I believe in karma--and it's wonderful to be on the receiving end of something positive. Thank you, cab driver for not only getting me to my destination on time, but also giving me a free ride! (This guy was for real, he didn't have change for the note I was carrying so he said "it's ok." And there were no ulterior motives at all.) I got some of that positive energy to fuel the rest of my day. 'Twas a busy but fulfilling workday. I'm (yawn) going to sleep well tonight :)

Books, Birth, and Murder.

I'm currently engrossed in John Grisham's "The Broker". It's fast-paced and similar to his earlier bestsellers. Before that I read "Plain Jane" by Laurien Gardner, a tale about Jane Seymour and King Henry VIII, that famous English monarch who couldn't stop getting married. He executed 2 of his 6 wives. One of them was 30 years younger than him. Queen Jane was #3 and died a few weeks after giving birth.

Talking of giving birth, have you ever listened to new mothers share all the details of their gruesome ordeal? I understand that it is a life-changing and (usually) positive experience despite the 20 or 30-something hours of labor that new moms routinely endure. Two chics were saying that they're into the natural way, no drugs involved. OK... My view is "drugs are good! There's a reason epidurals were invented, and you can always elect to have a C-section." Anyway, I usually steer clear of this kind of talk coz I feel that I have little to contribute.

There's so much going on in the world from gangsters attacking the Russian diplomat in Kenya, airline security alerts, conflicts in the Congo & Middle East, to the recent spotlight on the JonBenet Ramsey murder case. That Karr dude is weird. The whole affair is suspicious and tragic. Now, seeing a very young child wearing make-up and parading in adult-style clothing is very strange. I think child beauty pageants should be done away with.